Things I'll change when I take David Stern's job

Every sport has rules that sometimes make me scratch my head. I'm certain there have to be solutions that can't totally affect the outcome of a game considering every play matters. So I'm Commissioner of the NBA for the day, and these are some of the things I would change:

No player can foul completely out of the game. You should have the players you want to decide a game available to you unless they get ejected. Instead, let's just say after six fouls anyone they foul gets 3 free throws. This way its a win win for both teams. His teams has him available for offense and the opposing team has the opportunity to get 3 free shots if he's clumsy.

The NBA must have a penalty box. Lately every fight in the NBA has been blown a little out of proportion, so I propose we make the NBA like hockey where an occasional fight is part of the game. Let the two players have at it for 30 uninterrupted seconds then put them in the penalty box for 3 minutes. At least this way the fans and the media won't be so outraged when a fight occurs because they'll know it could happen in every game.

When a team is over the foul limit, the other team gets a one and one free throw attempt if the player was not in the act of shooting. This works in college and I think its a good idea. I don't think you should automatically be rewarded two free shots if you weren't shooting the ball. You have to make the first one to get a chance at the second one. Its only fair, considering you weren't shooting in the first place.

If a player is airborne and the defender slides under him, it can NEVER be a charge!!! This one irritates me the most. What is the airborne player supposed to do to avoid hitting the defender at this point? I don't know too many people who can stop completely in mid air just to avoid some dude who slid under him!

The season would be shortened to 62 games. Its just too long.

Every playoff series with the exception of the Conference Finals and The Finals would be a best of 3 series. The players and coaches would have to be on top of their game every night as opposed to having game after game after game to play competitively. As it stands now, none of the players or coaches fret after a loss. If you are only afforded one loss that would pick up the intensity enormously and make every game competitive.

Finally, players and coaches would not be fined or suspended for criticizing the officials if it is blatantly obvious they are doing a horrible job. I'm not going to deprive NBA players of their first amendment rights. If you think the officiating was exceptionally bad, you should be able to say so. The officials should be held accountable if they are not doing a good job. Having said all that, the losing team will always feel like they got the short end of the officiating stick.

These are just a few things that this woman would like to see changed in the NBA. Its easy for me to focus on these things because Stern already took care of the most important matter. He made sure the players would be dressed appropriately when arriving at the arena. Way to tackle the big problems Dave!

A I, What defines an MVP, NBA officiating

A I is on the trading block yet again. How can someone with his resume` be so ridiculed by the media and or team owners. They all circle the date when A I is coming to their city because there's most assuredly going to be a crowd (unless it's Philly of late) Why wouldn't they jump at the opportunity to witness that on a nightly basis. These owners and media outlets can try to convince us that he's too hard to play with and etc., but at the end of the day the NBA is a business and if he does nothing besides get you 30+ points a night and give you a chance to win, he'll put butts in the seats and I tend to think any smart business man would jump on that!

MVP What exactly defines the MVP? I can't quite figure it out because the requirements seem to change yearly. Is it the guy who's most valuable to his league? No, because Kobe would have won it in 2005-2006. Say what you will about Kobe, but he had 50+ year old women in my office asking me about his 62 thru 3 quarters at Dallas and his 81 point performance against Toronto. He became must see t v because you knew on any given night he could do something historic. What could have been more valuable to the league than that? Is it the player with the best statistics (K G) or does he have to have the best statistics for a contender?? (T D) Is it the player who if he misses a game his team will have a HARD time winning without him? (A I) Is it the player that requires so much attention he makes it easier for his teammates? (S O) Is it the player that has been anointed as "The King"?(LBJ) I just don't know. There definitely need to be some guidelines. They should probably just do away with it, because the outcome is always debatable!

NBA Officiating Am I the only person in the world that has a problem with the fact that Superstars get officiated differently than so called role players? Why is it that commentators say "he's a superstar so he's going to get that call" and no one raises an eyebrow? Am I to believe that because a certain player only plays about 25 minutes a night, he is not worthy of the same calls as the player that plays 40 minutes a night? That is ridiculous when you say it aloud, or in this case read it aloud. I personally think the players who do all the dirty work for the Superstars to be Superstars should be rewarded accordingly. Role players make the team go. Someone has to rebound and play defense and do the little things that actually win games, but don't make highlight reels. If the Commish is so worried about the image of the league he'll focus more on the atrocious officiating that has taken place of late. You always hear about them wanting to appeal to the "casual fans". Well trust me, the causal fans care more about the fact that the role player on their favorite team just drove down the lane and came up bleeding with no call than they care about what A I was wearing when he got to the arena. It just seems like the Commish is putting way too much effort into things that don't affect the integrity of the game. What's the sense in that? Is it really going to matter if D Wade is wearing a dress shirt after the game is over? No. But, it will matter if he skips to the free throw line 25 times in an NBA Finals game. Not that something like that would ever happen, but you get my point.

I'm sorry, that's not who I am

Its the middle of the week and we've been treated to another athlete apologizing for whatever offensive words, gestures or behaviors he was involved in over the weekend. Now, a lot of the national media outlets feel these apologies are disingenuous and half hearted. Hey, maybe they are. But, we all know these athletes are urged by their respective organizations to go do damage control. The disingenuous apologies don't bother me because I understand they do it because they have to. I don't necessarily agree with it, because I don't think you should apologize if you can live with your actions. Why apologize just to make someone else feel better? If you can live with yourself it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. Having said all that, I do have a problem with the athletes playing the "that's not who I am" card. Yes dear, that is exactly who you are. It may not be who you are all the time, but it is who you are in certain situations and that's not always something you should feel bad about. There are things that can happen to all of us in life that will cause us to do things we may not do under normal circumstances. If we feel threatened, or violated or just frustrated by someone, they could provoke us to do things we may not be proud of one day. Most of us have the luxury of not having it be scrutinized in the media because let's face it, we're not "famous". Some of the things these athletes get lambasted for are just completely ridiculous because most sane human beings might react the same way if they were in that situation. But unfortunately for professional athletes, image is everything and a lot of media personnel tend to take the "Holier than Thou" route when covering these stories rather than the empathetic route. If you athletes genuinely feel you did nothing to be sorry about, don't waste your time or mine coming on television reading something your publicist wrote. Sometimes you're just in the right place at the wrong time and nothing you say can make amends for that.

NBA CARES

The NBA lacks drama up until the playoffs and its all because the players take NBA Cares the wrong way. They care too damn much about the opposition! Every time a player is asked about the skills of another player, they just shower them with compliments. When did they get so soft? There are no real rivalries anymore, because all of the "Superstars" adore each other! Some of them claim to be the best of friends. Its sickening to watch these players compliment each other at every opportunity! The league would be so much better if it had players other than Kobe and Shaq that had a genuine distaste for each other. The regular season games would garner much more attention if fans felt that 2 players wanted nothing more than to demolish each other. Its okay to respect your opponent, but most of these players go above and beyond to show their admiration for one another. Save all the affection for retirement! Back in the day the "best" players really wanted to know who the "best of the best" was. Jordan and Dominique competed in the dunk contest because they wanted bragging rights. We don't get that from today's players. We basically get to decide who's the best from the number of free throws they attempt in the playoffs! (Superstars get all the calls) Kobe, Lebron, D-Wade, Melo, its time for you guys to settle this debate on the court. Next time you face one another, try to put up career highs and try to hold your opponent to career lows. Give the fans something to look forward to! And hey, if that isn't motivation enough, Lebron, Kobe said something about yo momma!